same as it ever was (talking heads)

Tuesday, October 11, 2005

I should stop doing countdowns

As many of you know I'm currently counting down my 100 favorite songs. I started this process in mid July and now it's mid October. I still have 20 songs that I haven't counted down yet, pretty pathetic, I know. I know many of you probably can't sleep or concentrate at work b/c of the lack of closure that has accompanied this countdown, and for mental and emotional distress I have caused...I apologize from the bottom of my heart. I have come to realize something from this whole process though, a life lesson of sorts, I should from this day forward stop doing countdowns with more than 10 things being counted down in the list, hell 10 things may be to many too. Maybe the next list I countdown should contain 2 things in it, I think I could handle that. There are definitely some countdowns I couldn't handle though. Imagine me counting down a shuttle launch. Fucking disaster. I don't know if the fucking shuttle would ever get off the ground, I think the launch is voice activated, meaning the countdown is a necessity. It would be a total waste of tax payer money. Even if the launch isn't voice-activated the astronauts would have some pretty bad whiplash from the unexpected take-off, and the astronauts would be fucking pissed off at my ass because their necks and shit would hurt, and I don't want a bunch of astronauts pissed off at me, a mean bunch if I've seen one, did you know that John Glenn shot JFK and Allan Shepard was a serial killer? It's true. How about leading the Times Square countdown? If I led the TSCd it'd still be like 1987 or some shit. Dick Clark was a pretty young dude back then too and I was much smaller, he would have probably kicked my ass pretty good, and it'd still be the 80's and shit. People would be wearing double breasted suits, they'd be listening to Kasha Goo-Goo, they'd think Eddie Murphy was still cool, we'd all be doing coke three times a day, parachute pants, The Cosby Show, Shelley Long would be a popular entertainer still! Shelley fucking Long!!! Holy fuck it'd be fucked up. I'm glad I wasn't or won't ever be in charge of that countdown. How about those movie countdowns? What a disaster if I was the dude who had to change the day before the big event in the movie, if I was the dude marking off the calendar days everyone would be totally fucked. You dudes know what I'm talking about the musical montage movie countdowns. Those poor inner city fuckers would never pass those stupid ass statewide tests that are mandatory for the entire school to take, like in that movie Lean on Me. If I was in charge of flipping over those big generic cards, those kids would be fucked, it'd go something like this..."What do you mean the test is today? The countdown says we still have 43 days left before the test?" "Um, yeah, about that, I forgot the flip the cards a couple of days, I'm really bad with countdowns" and then Morgan Freeman would whip my ass. Same thing goes with those political fundraiser countdowns they have in the movies, and they're always trying to save nuclear power plants from going up or animals from becoming extinct. No way would we have enough money left to save kids from cancer or buffalo from poachers, I would fuck up the countdown big time. SO, I'm going to finish out the songs countdown in the next millennium and then, sadly, I think I'm done with countdowns. The world will be a much better fucking place, trust me.

10 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

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Tuesday, October 11, 2005 7:15:00 PM

 
Anonymous Max said...

I think countdown rule

Wednesday, October 12, 2005 9:04:00 AM

 
Blogger U2isOverratedandSucksTerribly-WorstBandEver said...

Yeah.. I would agree since the songs you are counting down are crap... i didn't see one single Hanson or Partridge Family song in there... what a travesty!

Wednesday, October 12, 2005 12:40:00 PM

 
Blogger Brent said...

Dude, he's obviously leaving Hanson's chart-toppers for his Top 10.

Wednesday, October 12, 2005 7:41:00 PM

 
Blogger Scrubby Nub and The Bothered Brigade said...

Countdown away, I say. I've gone three weeks before without even blogging. That's far more pathetic. I personally dig the Cd's - two, 10, 100, 1,00 - fuck it. Do 'em all.

Wednesday, October 12, 2005 8:06:00 PM

 
Blogger cgpop said...

Oh, I'll finish, I just don't think I'll do another countdown, but I probably will.

Wednesday, October 12, 2005 10:02:00 PM

 
Blogger Satisfied '75 said...

I threatened numerous times to de-link Y2 if he didnt post.

Thursday, October 13, 2005 2:14:00 AM

 
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