same as it ever was (talking heads)

Wednesday, December 07, 2005

Scooby-Doo Theory (The first of many posts about cartoon characters and drug intake)

First off, don't worry, this isn't a post about how Scooby and Shaggy smoke pot (I'll cover this a little, but this thing goes much deeper than that). This is a post about the most notorious drug taking cartoon of all time....Fred....yes Fred. Allow me to explain....

The fact of the matter is, I don't care if this is modern day or 1960's or 1970's or any era post...oh I'll say 1950's to be safe, anyone who wears an orange scarf on a daily basis is either A. totally gay or B. a complete drug taking maniac. I hope we can all agree on this point, because really what other excuse do dudes have for wearing an orange scarf on a daily basis? Not like an "Oh it's really cold and snowing outside I'd better put on my orange scarf so I don't catch a cold" orange scarf, but an everyday accessory orange scarf, worn everyday. I'll re-iterate, only gay people and drug maniacs. That's cleared up now. Ok, next step. Fred is totally straight. Allow me to explain....

Daphne, Ok. Daphne isn't a drug addict, but she's a complete whore. Let's look at her get-up on a daily basis. High heels, a short purple skirt, and FUCKING LIGHT LACEY PURPLE PANTYHOSE! This is easy pickens fellas, girls who wear shit like this don't even need alcohol, they are ready to go already. If another girl walked into a room dressed like Daphne dresses on a regular basis all the other chicks would quietly say to each other, "Heather, oh Heather come here!", "What? Oh My God!", "I knooooowwww, what a fucking whore!", "Total slut! What a slut-bag!". And they'd be right, she's a total whore, whores, hookers, what have you, they dress like this. Ok, so Daphne is getting some dick, on a daily basis. The only possible person to supply Daphne with her daily hog craving is Fred. Don't believe me? I'll explain why Fred is the only person in the Gang who could satisfy Daphne. I'll go through the list...

Shaggy. Shaggy is bohemian stoner. Shaggy is so high on a daily basis he thinks that they are cruising around the country following Hot Tuna on tour. He doesn't understand why the gang keeps showing up haunted amusement parks. Daphne was a Kappa Kappa Gamma at FSU, she listens to ABBA. Oil and Water don't mix folks, even though Daphne is whore she wouldn't touch Shaggy with Velma's pussy.

Velma. Now don't get me wrong, I'm sure Velma would be more than happy satisfy any of Daphne's sexual needs. Velma was captain of the field hockey and women's golf teams at either Wellesley or Bryn Mawr (you can decide for yourself). Unfortunately for Velma, Daphne doesn't swing that way. Sure she hooked up with a couple of chicks at FSU, but that was more for the sake of experimentation. Sure, some drunk frat dude caught one of the episodes and posted it on the web (making Velma even more sexually frustrated) but she doesn't swing that way anymore. Where are we at? Scooby-Doo.

Scooby-Doo. Sure she likes the dick and and was a pseudo-lesbian in college, but Daphne isn't enough of a freak to have sex with a dog, even a dog with the gift of speech. She wouldn't have to dress like a whore to fuck a dog. I'm sure most dogs would be glad to have sex with a chick as hot as Daphne. So since Scooby-Doo isn't on the list we can go ahead and rule out Scrappy-Doo as well.

The Harlem Globetrotters. You bet your ass she's fucked all repeat ALL of the Globetrotters (possibly at the same time), but they only popped up to help solve crime periodically. As we've already mentioned she needs a constant flow of dick. Abbot and Costello? Maybe, also part-timers though.

Fred. Yes, Fred, I've led us back to Fred. Daphne and Fred get it on like rabbits. So this means that not only Scooby and Shaggy are stoned 24/7 but Fred is a fucking walking medicine cabinet. Don't (or do) worry, I'll explain more about cartoon characters and drug use, I just wanted to get these cartoon drug icons out of the way first (and explain to the uninitiated about Fred! A fucking orange scarf dude?! Everyday!!! Put down the ketamine pal.)

editor's note: First off shout-outs to marathonpacks and aquariumdrunk for their excellent interviews on muzzleofbees yesterday and today. You dudes and chicks should be reading (if you're not already) these superior music blogs. Also the posts may slow down a bit the next two weeks leading up to Christmas. I still love the blogging I will just be extremely busy allowing diminished time for my favorite hobby, just a heads up. Also I got on some of that my space shiot, I see this as a great opportunity to fuck around and waste more of my time (Bones, what is you's guys my space stuff, I'm badly in need of friends and shit).

61 Comments:

Blogger Captain Bee said...

Just check my blog. You'll laugh. It involves free strippers on a local university campus.

Wednesday, December 07, 2005 10:32:00 PM

 
Anonymous bones said...

Dude, great post. "Daily hog craving" is hilarious...

By the way, isn't that orange scarf called an ascot? Not being picky, just curious. Want to make sure I have my neck-wear terms in check...

Oh, and MySpace, here ya go:

http://www.myspace.com/weatheredliving

and, uh, I'm not sure who this dude is, but I'm pretty certain he can rock really hard:

http://www.myspace.com/dandangerous

Wednesday, December 07, 2005 11:52:00 PM

 
Blogger The Captain of the Ship said...

NOOOO. no myspace. speaking of whores....

Thursday, December 08, 2005 1:08:00 AM

 
Blogger cgpop said...

Thanks Bones man. Captain Bee, that was a great post, I wasn't able to check the links though, I'll do it again. Captain of the ship, the myspace thing is so I can fuck with people more than anything.

Thursday, December 08, 2005 5:19:00 AM

 
Blogger cgpop said...

I didn't know that was an ascot either, shit, there goes my Scooby-Doo theory.

Thursday, December 08, 2005 5:20:00 AM

 
Blogger Scrubby Nub and The Bothered Brigade said...

I don't think your theory went anywhere. Dude wears an ascot daily? Shit's gotta be fucked up there. I mean, he's like what? 18? 20? More than a little weird.

Thursday, December 08, 2005 4:21:00 PM

 
Blogger cgpop said...

Thanks SNBB, I didn't think so either, total drug freak. Also I think Velma's name is Thelma? Maybe not? I don't really care.

Thursday, December 08, 2005 9:08:00 PM

 
Anonymous max said...

Pretty sure Hugh Hefner wears an Ascot everyday and no one is doubting he has won in this game we call life.

Thursday, December 08, 2005 9:44:00 PM

 
Anonymous bones said...

Good point, Max. And Adrian Zmed wore a tie around his head bandana-style in Bachelor Party, and... well, I'm afraid I'm not really going anywhere with this. Just wanted to bring up Adrian Zmed, I guess...

Thursday, December 08, 2005 9:47:00 PM

 
Blogger Captain Bee said...

Dude, there's more stripper pics on my site. I seriously don't know why this girl can't keep her pants on.

Thursday, December 08, 2005 9:56:00 PM

 
Blogger Satisfied '75 said...

capt bee. your blog rules. many a mustache ride going on in that dorm.

Thursday, December 08, 2005 10:26:00 PM

 
Blogger cgpop said...

Bones, that was a great Adrian Zmed name-check. Captain Bee's blog is the shit, a must read.

Thursday, December 08, 2005 10:36:00 PM

 
Anonymous Chops said...

Chops here.

If we're on "cartoon character relationships" (sort of on it), then don't you think Velma and Pepermint Patty would have some hot lesbian action?

Sunday, December 11, 2005 9:21:00 AM

 
Anonymous Chops said...

Chops here.

Oh yeah, and Bones, I think only one person on this post block here had Adrian Zmed written on his suade backpack in high school.

And that person, was me.

The real question is, how was he NOT in a Police Academy movie? Especially after Gutenburg left. Just doesn't make sense.

Sunday, December 11, 2005 9:26:00 AM

 
Blogger cgpop said...

Tang licking galore on the PP and Velms Chops, great point.

Monday, December 12, 2005 8:24:00 PM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/casino%20online/3_casinoss.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/casino%20online/3_casinoss.png[/IMG][/URL]

Thursday, May 27, 2010 12:09:00 PM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/buy%20cialis/16_mycialis.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/buy%20cialis/16_mycialis.png[/IMG][/URL]

Friday, May 28, 2010 12:05:00 PM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/buy%20viagra%20online/6_viagra1.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/buy%20viagra%20online/6_viagra1.png[/IMG][/URL]


[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/buy%20viagra%20online/17_buygenericviagra.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/buy%20viagra%20online/17_buygenericviagra.png[/IMG][/URL]


[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/buy%20viagra%20online/17_buygenericviagra1.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/buy%20viagra%20online/17_buygenericviagra1.png[/IMG][/URL]

Saturday, May 29, 2010 1:41:00 PM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/buy%20risperdal%20consta/14_buy_risperdal_consta.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/buy%20risperdal%20consta/14_buy_risperdal_consta.png[/IMG][/URL]

Sunday, May 30, 2010 2:44:00 PM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/casino%20online/3_casinoss.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/casino%20online/3_casinoss.png[/IMG][/URL]

Wednesday, June 02, 2010 8:44:00 AM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/casino%20online/3_casinoss.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/casino%20online/3_casinoss.png[/IMG][/URL]

Wednesday, June 02, 2010 12:16:00 PM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/buy%20viagra%20online/2_buy_viagra_online.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/buy%20viagra%20online/2_buy_viagra_online.png[/IMG][/URL]

Thursday, June 03, 2010 9:27:00 PM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/buy%20viagra%20online/4_buy_viagra_online.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/buy%20viagra%20online/4_buy_viagra_online.png[/IMG][/URL]

Friday, June 04, 2010 1:16:00 AM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/buy%20viagra%20online/12_buy_viagra_online.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/buy%20viagra%20online/12_buy_viagra_online.png[/IMG][/URL]

Saturday, June 05, 2010 5:15:00 AM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/buy%20viagra%20online/1_buy_viagra_online.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/buy%20viagra%20online/1_buy_viagra_online.png[/IMG][/URL]

Saturday, June 05, 2010 8:42:00 AM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/casino%20online/2_casinoss.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/casino%20online/2_casinoss.png[/IMG][/URL]

Sunday, June 06, 2010 11:21:00 AM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/casino%20online/3_casinoss.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/casino%20online/3_casinoss.png[/IMG][/URL]

Sunday, June 06, 2010 3:00:00 PM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/casino%20online/2_casinoss.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/casino%20online/2_casinoss.png[/IMG][/URL]

Monday, June 07, 2010 4:15:00 PM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/buy%20viagra%20online/13_buy_viagra_online.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/buy%20viagra%20online/13_buy_viagra_online.png[/IMG][/URL]

Tuesday, June 08, 2010 5:37:00 PM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/casino%20online/2_casinoss.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/casino%20online/2_casinoss.png[/IMG][/URL]

Wednesday, June 09, 2010 7:11:00 PM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/buy%20viagra%20online/2_buy_viagra_online.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/buy%20viagra%20online/2_buy_viagra_online.png[/IMG][/URL]

Thursday, June 10, 2010 5:48:00 PM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/buy%20viagra%20online/11_buy_viagra_online.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/buy%20viagra%20online/11_buy_viagra_online.png[/IMG][/URL]

Thursday, June 10, 2010 9:09:00 PM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/casino%20online/2_casinoss.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/casino%20online/2_casinoss.png[/IMG][/URL]

Friday, June 18, 2010 10:33:00 AM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/casino%20online/1_casinoss.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/casino%20online/1_casinoss.png[/IMG][/URL]

Friday, June 18, 2010 1:53:00 PM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/buy%20cialis/3_mycialis.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/buy%20cialis/3_mycialis.png[/IMG][/URL]

Saturday, June 19, 2010 4:52:00 PM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/buy%20cialis/2_mycialis.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/buy%20cialis/2_mycialis.png[/IMG][/URL]

Saturday, June 19, 2010 8:20:00 PM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/buy%20cialis/15_mycialis.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/buy%20cialis/15_mycialis.png[/IMG][/URL]

Sunday, June 20, 2010 2:33:00 AM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/buy%20viagra%20online/11_viagra1.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/buy%20viagra%20online/11_viagra1.png[/IMG][/URL]


[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/buy%20viagra%20online/20_buygenericviagra.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/buy%20viagra%20online/20_buygenericviagra.png[/IMG][/URL]


[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/buy%20viagra%20online/10_buygenericviagra1.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/buy%20viagra%20online/10_buygenericviagra1.png[/IMG][/URL]

Sunday, June 27, 2010 3:16:00 AM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/buy%20viagra%20online/9_viagra1.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/buy%20viagra%20online/9_viagra1.png[/IMG][/URL]


[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/buy%20viagra%20online/19_buygenericviagra.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/buy%20viagra%20online/19_buygenericviagra.png[/IMG][/URL]


[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/buy%20viagra%20online/7_buygenericviagra1.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/buy%20viagra%20online/7_buygenericviagra1.png[/IMG][/URL]

Sunday, June 27, 2010 12:53:00 PM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/buy%20viagra%20online/17_viagra1.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/buy%20viagra%20online/17_viagra1.png[/IMG][/URL]


[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/buy%20viagra%20online/16_buygenericviagra.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/buy%20viagra%20online/16_buygenericviagra.png[/IMG][/URL]


[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/buy%20viagra%20online/5_buygenericviagra1.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/buy%20viagra%20online/5_buygenericviagra1.png[/IMG][/URL]

Sunday, June 27, 2010 7:57:00 PM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/buy%20viagra%20online/4_viagra1.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/buy%20viagra%20online/4_viagra1.png[/IMG][/URL]


[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/buy%20viagra%20online/9_buygenericviagra.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/buy%20viagra%20online/9_buygenericviagra.png[/IMG][/URL]


[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/buy%20viagra%20online/4_buygenericviagra1.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/buy%20viagra%20online/4_buygenericviagra1.png[/IMG][/URL]

Sunday, June 27, 2010 11:44:00 PM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/buy%20viagra%20online/10_viagra1.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/buy%20viagra%20online/10_viagra1.png[/IMG][/URL]


[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/buy%20viagra%20online/8_buygenericviagra.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/buy%20viagra%20online/8_buygenericviagra.png[/IMG][/URL]


[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/buy%20viagra%20online/18_buygenericviagra1.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/buy%20viagra%20online/18_buygenericviagra1.png[/IMG][/URL]

Monday, June 28, 2010 4:29:00 AM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/casino%20online/1_casinoss.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/casino%20online/1_casinoss.png[/IMG][/URL]

Saturday, July 03, 2010 8:47:00 AM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/casino%20online/3_casinoss.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/casino%20online/3_casinoss.png[/IMG][/URL]

Saturday, July 03, 2010 12:36:00 PM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/casino%20online/3_casinoss.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/casino%20online/3_casinoss.png[/IMG][/URL]

Saturday, July 03, 2010 8:27:00 PM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/casino%20online/3_casinoss.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/casino%20online/3_casinoss.png[/IMG][/URL]

Sunday, July 04, 2010 2:48:00 AM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/casino%20online/3_casinoss.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/casino%20online/3_casinoss.png[/IMG][/URL]

Sunday, July 04, 2010 10:25:00 AM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/buy%20cialis/3_mycialis.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/buy%20cialis/3_mycialis.png[/IMG][/URL]

Tuesday, July 06, 2010 6:46:00 AM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/buy%20cialis/9_mycialis.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/buy%20cialis/9_mycialis.png[/IMG][/URL]

Tuesday, July 06, 2010 10:21:00 AM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/buy%20cialis/10_mycialis.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/buy%20cialis/10_mycialis.png[/IMG][/URL]

Tuesday, July 06, 2010 5:29:00 PM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/buy%20cialis/5_mycialis.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/buy%20cialis/5_mycialis.png[/IMG][/URL]

Tuesday, July 06, 2010 9:25:00 PM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/buy%20cialis/16_mycialis.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/buy%20cialis/16_mycialis.png[/IMG][/URL]

Wednesday, July 07, 2010 2:15:00 AM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/casino%20online/16_style_casino.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/casino%20online/16_style_casino.png[/IMG][/URL]

Thursday, July 08, 2010 8:59:00 AM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/casino%20online/16_style_casino.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/casino%20online/16_style_casino.png[/IMG][/URL]

Thursday, July 08, 2010 12:13:00 PM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/casino%20online/18_style_casino.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/casino%20online/18_style_casino.png[/IMG][/URL]

Thursday, July 08, 2010 6:21:00 PM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/casino%20online/1_style_casino.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/casino%20online/1_style_casino.png[/IMG][/URL]

Thursday, July 08, 2010 9:11:00 PM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/casino%20online/17_style_casino.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/casino%20online/17_style_casino.png[/IMG][/URL]

Friday, July 09, 2010 12:44:00 AM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/buy%20cialis/7_mycialis.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/buy%20cialis/7_mycialis.png[/IMG][/URL]

Monday, July 19, 2010 12:20:00 AM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/buy%20cialis/6_mycialis.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/buy%20cialis/6_mycialis.png[/IMG][/URL]

Monday, July 19, 2010 5:35:00 AM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/link/buy%20cialis/5_mycialis.html][IMG]http://imgwebsearch.com/35357/img0/buy%20cialis/5_mycialis.png[/IMG][/URL]

Monday, July 19, 2010 1:56:00 PM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

[URL=http://casino-dealer.co.cc/link/casino%20online/3_casinoss.html][IMG]http://casino-dealer.co.cc/img/casino%20online/3_casinoss.png[/IMG][/URL]

Friday, October 29, 2010 3:55:00 AM

 

Post a Comment

<< Home